That’s right! Yahoo Music has won a todaywasawesome award for the category of advancement of anti-DRM. Yahoo music recently announced that they’re going to disable their DRM servers. That’s great, just that much less DRM in the world! Whoo!
Wait…they did what?!
Apparently Yahoo isn’t just disabling their DRM servers, they’ve gone the EXTRA MILE and are going to be disabling all the music that anyone has bought with their service! Not only will there be less DRM in this world but less DRM music! What a break through for digital rights to have Yahoo leading the the way in doing away with DRM technology.
But seriously, they should get an award
At least they’re proving, by stealing all of their users music, that DRM is a failure wherever it’s implemented. Here’s a breakdown in who gets robbed in DRM and non DRM situations.
DRM situations: The consumer is robbed of things they already paid for.
Non-DRM situations: No one is robbed of anything.
I’d like to announce that I’m also nominating Yahoo for biggest douche of the year award as well.
UPDATE Yahoo has vowed to reimburse customers. I guess it could be worse.
The new iphone is so amazing! The other day I had some car trouble and I was stuck in the middle of no where with no help in site. Luckily I still was in 3G coverage so the internet was lighting fast, I found out where I was using the built-in GPS and starting looking for a mechanic.
I started in on wikipedia to find out what might be wrong with my car and 4 1/2 hours later I was too busy watching sweet car crashes on youtube to care about being stuck in the middle of no where!
In fact, I felt so mobile I made this blog post and sent an email to my boss to let him know I wouldn’t be in today!
Thanks iphone!
What is a biological zombie?
A biological zombie is the most popular current incarnation of zombies. These are zombies that are created through the spread of a virus, generally created by man, or other biological factor that physically changes a human into a zombie using science.
Movies In which biological zombies are used
Important Facts
- They are infectious, anyone they bite will probably turn into a zombie. Kill them quickly
- They used to be slow but thanks to 28 days later they now run fast as hell
- The best way to kill them is to shoot them in the head
- They will eventually starve to death*
- For some reason they have a human brain magnet and will always be drawn to fleshy pink parts
- They’re probably wicked strong
The Guide
So you woke up one morning and all of the sudden there were zombies kicking down your door trying to devour your flesh. Time to break out the old firearm and defend yourself. What’s that? Don’t have a firearm? Your liberal ass probably doesn’t deserve salvation, good work trying to make guns illegal for the entire time you weren’t undead.
What you need
Many of you may be familiar with Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs as well you should be but that scale changes significantly in a zombie attack. Observe the modified pyramid:
Good strategies
Kill your self.
I kid I kid! But seriously, you might be better off.
Secure the area
Start off by securing your immediate vicinity or leave. You need time to think dammit! Can you fortify your house? If not get the hell out of it. The last thing you want to do is get trapped in a corner where you won’t be able to get out. Remember this hard fast rule: Whenever you’re stuck in a corner zombies will attack!
You need weapons, it doens’t matter how careful you are, you will always need weapons (unless you’re in a bomb shelter a la Matinee) and even then you’ll probably need them.
Get some guns!
If you don’t have guns you’ll need to get some, K-mart is almost worthless because they stopped carrying most ammunition. Thanks to that kid that Michael Moore manipulated you’ll have to go to gun stores, wallmart or pawn shops. Congrats, if you have to go to those places you’re probably dead. Be a boy scout and load up on zombie shooter’s today, before you need them! Copy my setup if you need some ideas.
Oh yeah, special note, if you live in England or any of the other countries that made guns illegal you’re probably screwed.
The real plan
The real plan has to be personally made, something that fits your circumstances. I made my first zombie plan when I worked in a mall. We knew that there was a sporting goods place in the mall so we could get guns, there was also a super target so we had food. The trick would just be to secure the borders to keep Zombie’s out. Now my situation has changed dramatically and I wouldn’t go near the mall.
Sit down with your family and come up with escape routes (to get away from zombies), code words (to verify they’re not a zombie) and procedures for slaughtering everyone anyone when if they get bit.
Still Confused?
Ask your questions and we’ll make sure you get the answers you need before the biological zombie’s attack!
This past weekend I met my niece for the first time. She’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve seen, so innocent and so cute. As I looked down into her bright blue eyes all I could think was “How will you survive the future? How will you know how to fight off zombies?”
All purpose zombie guide
Unlike most guides which only cover one type of zombie eventuality I will be covering every kind of possible zombie attack. Everyone knows there are three types:
- Biological Zombies – Zombies created by a virus, probably engineered by man.
- Magical Zombies – Zombies created by a witch/sorcerer. This is actually the easiest to survive!
- Apocalyptic Zombies – Zombies brought about by the end of the world. The Mac daddy of all zombie attacks and the hardest to survive.
So stay tuned for some updates and remember there are two kinds of people in this world: Those with a zombie plan and those without. Who would you rather be?
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