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TodayWasAwesome – Best OfSorry, The is under copyright
One day every word in the english language with be trademarked and you will be sued for using the word without paying homage to the owner. I for one will buy the words “the” and “a” because you can’t have a sentence without them.
Eventually communication will become so expensive that people will make up new words, as in a new language. This will, however, only work for a short period of time until these words are also copywritten. Everyone will learn sign language until it becomes so popular that signs start to come under trademark. But don’t worry, a race of aliens will over run us shortly there after and force us to learn their language. A language for which we will pay out the [insert colorful metaphor here] to speak.
I for one welcome our new vernacular overlords.
One movement will be “Open Source Language”, this project will mostly likely be started on source forge but will not be widely used because no one likes the interface and theres all sorts of studies showing that having proper training and support for open source language is more expensive than using exisiting forms of speech that cost money.
In addition to the core language movement there will be several split offs. The entire thing will be forked several times for different additions such as “Language-lite” and “love-language”, a language designed explicitly and solely for expressing feelings of love. Ironically it is based off of Klingon and nerds rejoice.
This forked language movement will come to an abrupt halt when the GPL, GNU and Public Commons license are all ruled unconstitutional. Not unconstitutional for the current form of the constitution but rather the new DRM version. In exchange for not being sued by the word-holders for using words that are under copyright such as “free” and “the” the US government offered to add on a few amendments making free content illegal. After all, think about how much money the content owners would be loosing if all of this free competition gained ground. It could kill the economy after all.
This version of the constitution will also cause a civil war because its DRM doesn’t allow it to be applied to individual states.
Leet language hackers will start popping up in Scandinavian countries where the laws are different and they can distribute language via the internets. Unfortunately the lobbies in the US Gov will make the US pressure these rogue states into prosecuting the language hackers under US copyright laws. It makes sense because corporations exceed countries in span and influence right?
To save money people will speak in more cryptic, less gramatically correct ways. For instance:
All your base are belong to us.
Buying the rights to use one form of the verb “to be” is cheaper than buying the rights to every tense. In this new world, the bombastic and ebonics speakers will be kings.
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