I had this wicked sweet dream last night where the world was being taken over by zombies, but not just any zombies, Musical zombies. These zombies craved brains alright but they also craved to talk about the talents of Duran Duran or how great the Monkeys were. See, the zombies had bad taste in music, that was the scary part.
They’d groan stuff like “Vanilla Ice was the last great artist!”. It was terrible, I fought as many as I could. I killed like five zombies with a shovel; no easy task I might add. Finally though, I succumbed to the hungry zombies and became one of them.
Amazingly enough I managed to retain some taste in music. I had like three other zombies with me and we went to go see if we couldn’t scare up some brains. We sauntered over to a house while discussing the merits of folk-rock and knocked on a door.
Suddenly from behind us we saw a drug dealer looking dude saunter around the corner with an UZI and he smiled. I dove to the side as my zombie companions were mowed down. I ran for my decaying life limbs flailing with some sort of beat rock mantra stuck in my head. I hid behind a car and finally I laid down in the ditch between the road and the sidewalk. I was just behind a car and a few inches from the sewer.
As I saw more guys gathering up the street, I considered going down the drain but I didn’t want to get all dirty (I was going to a concert later). There I lay, watching the feet up the street from under the car I was hiding behind. Finally the fear subsided and I attacked a police woman telling her about the value of having multiple keys on a song all the way…